I was financially illiterate. I was making a six-figure income but didn't understand how to manage it until 9 years into my career. No one ever explained it to me plainly. No one told me that if I saved half my income out of college I’d be retiring at age 38. And if they had, I’m not sure I would have listened. "Wealthy" just meant "rich." That felt out of reach. Investing? Not a gambler. I was contributing to my 401k at work but that's it. Ignorance was bliss, I was on auto-pilot. Until my daughter was born and I was about to double the cost of daycare. I told myself this is ridiculous. I decided to educate myself and it changed. My. Life. In this talk, I'll take you through my financial journey, introduce a life optimization framework, show you how investing works, whisper secrets about HSAs, and talk about what it means to “design your life.” We’ll even debug taxes together. I promise it’ll be fun. In less than an hour, you will know everything I wish I knew 10 years ago laid out in plain language.